Throughout life we will come across people who won’t have a positive impact on our life. Even though I’m young and still have plenty of people to meet in life, I have had a fair share of experiences with people I considered friends, who then turned into toxic people I needed to get out of my life.
I think removing toxic people from your life is a massive challenge a lot of people struggle to cope with and do. For some of us, it doesn’t come naturally to easily remove someone and we will continue to give those people or that specific person chance after chance because we are too scared to be brutally honest with ourselves and the person, that they are bringing a negative vibe to our life. We keep ‘friendships’ going because of the fear of looking like the bad person or having to be the one to make the move to remove them. It isn’t easy but I think the sooner we understand that these things are okay to do and NEED to be done for the sake of our mental health, it will be less difficult to do.
There are many different kind of toxic people out there but today I’m going to focus on the ones who don’t bring joy to you life, who don’t support you, who bring you down or try to make you feel bad; the ones who aren’t good for your mental health.
Sometimes it may take a few instances for you to realise that the specific person or people isn’t good for you. You may want to give them another chance and that’s okay, just don’t give them endless amount of chances because trust me, if they don’t change the first time, they won’t ever change. If they care and respect you enough, the will change their actions towards you to continue to be apart of your life.
The main thing to focus on to know whether you may be around a toxic person is to understand how they make you feel. If you feel scared of them in terms of saying no to plans because of how they react, or if they always try to belittle you or make your accomplishments in life seem silly or if they pick on your looks; this person or these people are not needed. There are plenty more people out there in this world who would give you the respect and support you deserve, who will treat you with kindness and make you feel loved. If the person or people are impacting your mental health negatively, then you need to let those toxic people go.
If this pandemic has taught me anything, it’s that life is too short. We never know when our last day on earth is or the last day we will see our friends and family again. Therefore, don’t waste life hanging around with people who make you feel like shit. Be the bigger person and end the relationship/friendship. Make a change to feel better within yourself, to be happier, to feel a weight lifted off your shoulders because you aren’t constantly worried about their judgements.
Surround yourself with the correct people. You will continuously meet new people throughout life and some you will adore with every part of your heart, some will become a new group of friends to go out with, someone might become a partner. This world is full of people, the right people you need to keep you happy and fulfil your needs.
Letting go of toxic people will most likely never be a fun thing to do (unless they have done something really bad which makes it slightly easier to get rid of them). That person or people may have been apart of your life for 20 years and then the relationship turns toxic. But, something to ask yourself is ‘will I be happier without them?’. Will you feel more like yourself? Can you be more yourself without them? Will you be able to live your life the way you want to without them? Will you be happy? Consider these questions, think about the answers. If the answers are yes, then you know you need to make a change.
When I say to let those toxic people go, I don’t mean to take action in a horrible way. You could start off talking to them less and giving yourself that distance from them. It’s not about removing them and being a bitch about it, you want to be the better person in this situation and not swoop to their level.
Life is too short. Live it the way you want to, with the people you want to live it with, the people who bring you positivity, the ones who help your mental health not make it worse. Let those toxic people go.